they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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