Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
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