problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize