Will you blow on my dice?
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
