i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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