Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
What drink are we having for lunch?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
