I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
