I'm jealous of your bromance
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
