Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
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