before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
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The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
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I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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