so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
