Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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