I think I won the penis lottery.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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