I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Randomize
