Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
