who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
