Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
My breasts were aching with rage.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize