end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Randomize