I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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