I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Pants are for mortals
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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