sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize