so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I'm passing your future prison.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
