"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
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