So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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