Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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