i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
