I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
