so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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