Where is the hickey?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
