Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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