I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Your topless pictures make me question reality
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...