Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
