Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Randomize
