fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Randomize
