your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Randomize
