"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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