omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
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Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
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That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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