You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
