cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
