Where are you?
In a non slutty way
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
My liver just had a heart attack.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
