im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
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