I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize