Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
