Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
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Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
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I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Drunk is not a location!
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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