Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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