This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
