Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
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