i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I got her a Nickelback box set.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
