oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
