He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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